I DON'T KNOW NO ONE CAUSE MY BRAIN WORE OUT

I Don’t Know No One, ‘Cause my Brain Wore Out!  

(Tune: Nobody Knows You When You’re Down and Out!)

Once I lived the life of a college grad, 

Had lots of friends and I was always glad!

Went to plays and movies, read lots of books, 

Went to nice restaurants with very good cooks!

Then my memory forgot how to store,

At first it was just numbers, but then it was more!

Birthdays, anniversaries, name and places, 

Like a deck of cards, without any aces!   

(Chorus) 

I don’t know no one, cause my brain wore out! 

Under my hat, there’s just grey hair!

Aside from that, there’s not much there!

If we ever meet on the street again,

I hope that I would greet you like a long lost friend, 

But now I fear I’d just stare in doubt, 

You see - I don’t know no one, 'cause my brain wore out!

Lyrics © 2022 Joan Levin

DIURETIC SONG 3 -- An Ode to Hydrochlorothiazide

DIURETIC SONG 3

An Ode to Hydrochlorothiazide

Tune: All I do is Dream of You the Whole Night Through

All I do is pee for you the whole day through,  

And when night falls, still nature calls, 

All ‘cause of you!

When I’m asleep, when I’m awake, 

You never give me any break, 

You’re steady, ready, but so hard to take!

I hardly can pronounce your name — Hydrochlorothiazide,

But sad to say I'm now your most unwilling bride!

If peeing were a job that paid, I'd be a millionaire today,

But I’m a volunteer for you the whole day through!

Lyrics © Joan Levin 2022 

DIURETIC SONG TO ROW ROW ROW

To the tune of Row Row Row at:  https://songmeanings.com/songs/view/3530822107859172640/

Here's the chorus of the original as sung by Bing Crosby with lyrics attributed to John Scott Trotter:

And then he'd row, row, row

Way up the river he would row, row, row

A hug he'd give her

Then he'd kiss her now and then

She would tell him when,

They'd fool around and fool around

And then they'd kiss again.

And then he'd row, row, row

A little further he would go, oh, oh, oh,

Then he'd drop both his oars

Take a few more encores,

And then he'd row, row, row.

Here's my parody version as I deal with the effects of a drug for high blood pressure called hydrochlorothiazide.

And she would go go go,

That pill made sure that she would go go go,

She’d take tour of 

every bathroom here and there, 

She really didn’t care,

As long as there was one close by 

She’d be there fast as she could fly to 

go go go,

That diuretic had her peeing day and night!   

She’d just start in to snore, 

When she’d have to go more, 

and she would Go Go Go! 

Parody Lyrics: (c) Joan D. Levin, 2022

                                        ###

DIURETIC SONG TO STORMY WEATHER

Diuretic Song

Tune: Stormy Weather

I know why, taking hikes beneath the sky, 

I can’t do now, 

Staying close to home is all I do now,

Yet I’m going all the time!  

I go on, and go on and on and on,

Can’t stop peeing!

HCTZ* overtook my being,  

I’m peeing all the time!

     That’s a pill the doctors give for hypertension, 

     (That’s the same as high blood pressure, I should mention)

     All I know is every hour I feel that same old tension, 

     That must be relieved again!

I’m so sad, my condition makes me mad, 

And I worry!

But can’t stop now, because I’ve gotta scurry. 

Back to that throne again! 

Joan Levin March 9, 2022

Lyrics (c) 2022 JoanDLevin

*HCTZ = Hydrochlorothiazide, a diuretic prescribed for high blood pressure.